My house and yard look great today. I got the bushes trimmed and mulched, my flowerbed mulched, all my laundry done and put way, and all of my dad's stuff boxed up until my brother and I can look at it together.
I've basically tried to stay busy so I wouldn't think about the first Father's Day without Dad. For the most part it worked. It helped that I was getting to some things that had been undone while I was dealing with his illness. It seemed like getting my life back together was an appropriate thing to do on Father's Day. Dad always liked his small garden, so in a way I was paying some homage there.
A woman that I work with was talking to me last week about Father's Day. She lost her dad a couple of months ago, after a long hospital stay--kind of like me. She was telling me that she was having a hard time going into stores and seeing displays of Father's Day gifts. I'll need to be sure and touch base with her tomorrow to see how she's doing.
I suppose the first one is the hardest. A couple of times today, I had some of those odd moments where you stop and all you feel is the loss and the hurt all over again. Everything is going fine and the, all of a sudden it hits you.
I guess it really is a one day at a time process.
Roger Green was kind enough to share some thoughts with me in an email. He also directed me to this recent post in his own blog. He's not the only person who only knows me from the other end of a computer who took a couple of minutes to check in on me today. I appreciated all of them so much. I hope that I can return the favor some day.
What I need now is some supper, some lap cat time, and some time alone with Keith. If it weren't for him, I would not have been able to make it through any of this.
I also need to call my brother and see how he is.
If you haven't done so already, call your father. I know I wish I could.