Monday Rambles

There's really only one thing I can say about last week:

I've certainly had better weeks.

Hell, I've certainly had better weeks while on chemotherapy!

This has been the roughest one so far.  Up to now, my main problam has been fatigue.  I've had a little nausea, sure.  Even threw up one time last round.  Overall, however, it's the fatigue that's been getting me down.

Nausea set in hard this time around.  I had the foresight to take off work last week, which was good, because I felt like throwing up all damn week long.  I did learn that feeling like you need to throw up is worse than actually throwing up.  At least if you do barf, you'll feel better.  But if you just feel like you want to, but continually don't, the result is misery.  I had that "need to" feeling for days on end, even got a good retch or two out of it, but no actually relief.

Friday night, I was actually laying in bed telling Keith that there was no way I could go on with the chemo if it was going to get worse than this.  And I felt so bad about it, because I've seen all the others at the cancer center who are so much worse off than me and still doing it.  I am still fat and have all my hair, after all.  My poor mother never had that chance.

As I'm about to sink in my own self-indulgence, I remember that I have a bottle of anti-nausea meds that I had not used to date, because I hadn't really needed them.  I looked up the side-effects online and they kind of scared me, but the really serious ones have a low chance of occurring.  Of course, I just know that I'm in the 2% that will get Parkinsons, but that's a self-indulgent post for another time.

My new best friend!

Honestly, if it weren't for those meds, I would probably still be in bed lying there moaning, dreaming of ramming a long-handled wooden spoon down my throat so I could finally throw up.  (Sorry about that, breakfast readers.)

Sorry about that pic.  I was lying in bed in the dark and had no idea where my phone was pointed.  Still, the whole thing is kind of indicative of how I was feeling at the time.

I did learn another helpful new thing this go around, as well.  I'd been taking Tylenol PM to deal with the shakes/aches from the IL2 shots I have to get all week.  I'd already figured out about when they'll hit and that taking the pills about an hour before that will deal with them and I won't be bothered by them.  The problem is that the PM also deals with the rest of my night, and I always wake up hung over when I have to take them.  That's just no fun, when you're already dealing with draginess and nausea.

This time around, I learned that a couple of ibuprofen will work just as well, without the immediate drowsiness and resultant hangover.  Score one for the fat guy with cancer!

I'm still hoping that the nausea will fade in a couple of weeks.  I have a lot going on right now:  end of the year at work, junk set out in my neighborhood in two weeks (which I refuse to miss), and helping plan the YesterNook Outdoor Sale for June.

My book sale didn't go too well, by the way.  I've extended it until Mother's Day, and the last three-four days are going to be 20% off on the whole booth (except furniture).  April ended up predictably low at both sites.  It's just a bad month.  It always is, even without the local team winning the championship in the middle of the month.

I've put a whole bunch of quickie shot type blogs up for the rest of this week and into next.  It was a part of last week's blog prep.  I'll get back to longer form posts soon, but I hope you;ll enjoy at least some of what I have in store.

Again, for all of you who have sent me such nice notes and things wishing me well, thank you so much.  I really have needed it lately.